Thursday, April 1, 2010

Dinotopia Themed Caskets

One of the most thoughtful gifts that you can give to a deceased relative is a themed casket, which makes it possible for them to travel into the hereafter with the dream that they cherished most dearly in life.

Families of departed Star Trek fans can choose from Photon Torpedo model casket, based on the Wrath of Khan movie.

Many colleges and universities now offer tastefully styled alumni caskets.



In that well-established tradition, we are proud to announce the availability of Dinotopia caskets for that special person who lived their life in the “land apart from time.”

We have worked closely with Timeless Funeral Products, U.S.A.’s leading supplier of custom caskets and coffins for burial and cremation. All of the designs are carefully applied by hand, and all the materials are environmentally friendly with no animal by-products. Even the “Saurian Skin” model is made from recycled plant-based cellulose.

The “Paleo” style comes with a custom stainless-steel museum mount and identification label so that your loved one can be easily excavated and correctly displayed by paleontologists of the future.

To learn more, please visit a showroom for a free personal consultation with an expert designer. Dinotopia caskets, coffins, and urns are available exclusively through funeral directors.
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Timeless Funeral Products
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Addendum: Howard Lyon sent me a sketch of his ideal Dinotopia casket design, which he calls "Rex in Peace." Thanks, Howard, and happy April 1 to all!
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21 comments:

  1. Peter UnderhillApril 1, 2010 at 10:59 AM

    Great Idea Jim, but if I was going to be dispatched in a coffin like that, I'd at least want the logo in a position that I could read it. Can I order two please? One for me and the other for my imaginary friend, Flora Lipo.

    ReplyDelete
  2. DakotaApril 1, 2010 at 11:03 AM

    Well, we've found the next part of Melianie/Azzy's collection. hahaha

    ReplyDelete
  3. Erin McGuireApril 1, 2010 at 11:21 AM

    April Fools?

    ReplyDelete
  4. Steve SomersApril 1, 2010 at 11:23 AM

    I would've expected more of a Jules Verne style casket, with a reverse view periscope so loved ones can have a more intimate visitation.
    Happy April 1st Mr Gurney :)

    ReplyDelete
  5. Christopher ManzanaresApril 1, 2010 at 12:13 PM

    Hilarious! I hope you're getting Royalties, Jim. I like the reverse Periscope idea, too. Try not to get caught in any puddles, today, ya? = D

    ReplyDelete
  6. Howard LyonApril 1, 2010 at 12:20 PM

    Maybe the coffin could come with a fine silty layer and several tons of pressure that would turn the fortunate departed into a beautiful fossil. If after 10,000 years you aren't well on your way to becoming a Classic Cambrian Cadaver™ you get your money back.*

    *re-stocking fees may apply

    ReplyDelete
  7. goat89April 1, 2010 at 12:58 PM

    HAHAAHHA ><
    IS there a limited edition where it is made out of Dino Bones/ ><

    ReplyDelete
  8. david hammondApril 1, 2010 at 1:00 PM

    you sir, are a goof and a foolsian. i congratulate you on your efforts :)

    ReplyDelete
  9. Chris JouanApril 1, 2010 at 2:07 PM

    Become extinct with style!

    ReplyDelete
  10. Gary DombrowskiApril 1, 2010 at 2:32 PM

    April Fools right? ~Gary

    ReplyDelete
  11. nystudiosApril 1, 2010 at 3:37 PM

    So glad that some here clued me into it being an April Fool's joke. For a brief minute my esteem for you plummeted like the Hindenburg.

    Good one.

    ReplyDelete
  12. C B SorgeApril 1, 2010 at 5:48 PM

    Even as a little kid I considered future archaelogists/paleontologists, leaving records and descriptions of things around me for their benefit. I can appreciate the sentiment!

    Ha, pretty hilarious though!

    ReplyDelete
  13. Super VillainApril 1, 2010 at 5:54 PM

    HAPPY BIRTHDAY JAMES!!

    Hilarious post, I wouldnt expect anything less then this from someone with a Birthday on April Fools, haha!

    Hope your having a great one!!

    ReplyDelete
  14. Sidharth ChaturvediApril 1, 2010 at 6:27 PM

    Happy April Fools to you too! :P

    ReplyDelete
  15. Daniel.ZApril 1, 2010 at 7:13 PM

    Hah. It's amazing that April Fool's gets people every time. Even though it happens at the same time every year!

    ReplyDelete
  16. Tyler JApril 2, 2010 at 1:21 AM

    Classic ^.^

    @ Steve-your comment made me laugh, I instantly thought of the steam-punk casket going wrong at the funeral. Hilarity ensues.

    ReplyDelete
  17. AnonymousApril 2, 2010 at 7:54 AM

    Well, over the holidays, I had a very interesting discussion on what would be involved in becoming a fossil with my geology student relatives. The purpose of which was to determine if it's possible to ask in one's will to be fossilised. So I completely support the idea of a fossilisation facilitating Dinotopia casket.

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  18. BegnaudApril 2, 2010 at 2:05 PM

    Very funny--did get me for a second, considering I read the post this morning. I find it hard to believe that the other coffins are real! A Star Trek coffin? Thanks for those links as well!

    ReplyDelete
  19. groperofeuropaApril 3, 2010 at 12:58 AM

    Presently considering ordering one of these to live in for a day every April 1st.. like some kind of isolation tank. Do they hold water well?

    ReplyDelete
  20. treplovskiApril 6, 2010 at 11:21 PM

    I like it!

    ReplyDelete
  21. SVSARTApril 7, 2010 at 6:24 AM

    LMAO ~ Reading this after April 1, I almost thought it was real! GOOD one had me going!!!

    ReplyDelete

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